Skip to main content

Insomnia

 The time is 3:50 am and I know that soon the cock will crow

Why I stay up so late every night is something I want to know


Many are times I get in bed early yearning for the arrival of a dream

Yet I lay awake, eyes closed because sleeping is harder than it seems


Don't you assume I'm up because of a girl for it won't sound right

If the girl of my dreams is the reason why I can't sleep at night


For in that state of sleeplessness, I'm flooded with regretful memories

I think of points I could have used in past arguments to win my adversaries


I become vulnerable to the voices in my head who gets me offended

By telling me I'm never enough and suicide is the only way I can end it


Whenever I fall asleep, my inner demons prey on me; their victim

But I know I'll never find rest until I find a way to defeat them


I'm optimistic that one day I will sleep peacefully, I believe I will

But for now as soon as day breaks I'm going to get some sleeping pills







Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Yours Hopefully

 Last night I laid in bed with my face gazing at the ceiling. Tears rolled to my ears as only I knew what and how I was feeling But sometimes I wonder what my pillow thinks every night Knowing it supports my head every time yet I still don't end up alright But how can I explain to an inanimate object what letting out is That I convert my pain to liquid and then send them as tears Weeks ago I got on a call with my cousin and he asked for some cash He has always been helpful to me so I felt bad telling him I didn't have Funny enough I had thought of calling him for some financial assistance But he called first and I disappointed him that instant "It's okay brother, soon we'll look back at moments like this and laugh", he said My eye balls got wet to his encouraging words, hopeful yet I cried instead  Today I got a mail from a job I was interviewed months ago to resume in two days Here I lay in bed soaking my pillow again, but I'm sure it understands these ar...

A Thousand Ways To Lie

Let's face it, we're all liars, though some of us are more creative. So I'll tell you few things I've said before and hope I don't regret this. "Ohh my gosh, I can't hear you, my network is really bad" I just couldn't tell you I'm bored by you but I wish I had. I tell you "I'm almost there" when I'm reluctant to get out of bed. Probably busy, going through thoughts filling up my head. I say "It's so great to see you" while putting on a fake smile. If I tell you what I meant, your happiness won't last for a while. "Sorry I didn't see your call, I'm really busy here in Tokyo" By now you should know I'm lying because I'm a real life Pinocchio. I use "I've got plans on that day" to get out of chances to meet new faces. Just because I feel uncomfortable in a crowd so I avoid new places. When the words I let out are hurting and too true, I say "I'm ...

DEPRESSURIZED

Some days I wake up, scared the day may be my last I haven’t done much good deeds judging from my past I gave my life to Christ but took it back the next day Know sinning is wrong but still do bad things my friends say I go to sleep without praying like I had a fight with God But wake up screaming “JESUS” when I dream of losing blood People ask how I’m doing and I lie “I’m fine” But can’t even enjoy life knowing I’m running out of time There’s light at the end of the tunnel and that’s hope But some thoughts make me want to end life with a rope I attempted to do the wrong, I attempted to let life go Now I wear long sleeves afraid my attempts will show Everything hurts, failed promises, heartbreaks and backbiting To a point, the ones I call friends are also demons I’m fighting Sucked up in a black hole, trying to escape depression But you can’t run away from what will always be your reflection Saturday nights, I feel the pressure, I get depressed Sunday morning, ...